Less Than 48 Hours

I leave for Aruba in less than 48 hours. I cannot believe how fast this trip has come up. Got most of my packing done today. Going to finish up the rest tomorrow and then I will be ready to go. Adios mother fuckers. I'm blowing this candy stand!!!

Single Digits

Aruba is exactly 9 days away!!! I'm excited. The boyfriend is going hunting this weekend. I think it will be good to get away from each other for the weekend. We spend way too much time together. That's not good. We did look at a house tonight that we both really liked and if there aren't any offers put in on it, Jeff said he might put in an offer. This house was super nice. 3 bedroom 2 full bath. It was awesome. I get to spend some time with Leighanne tomorrow night. Abby was supposed to be with us too but she has been being a stupid fucking bitch lately. So when she said she was going to hang out with Nathan it didn't bother us. It was more of a relief.

So it was one week ago today San Bruno blew up. Here's to remember all the people that lost their lives and to the ones who are still fighting for them.

I Hate When

I hate when people make plans with you and then in the middle of hanging out they leave to hang out with someone else. Why do you bother making plans to hanging out with me knowing that you are gonna leave? That's fucked up. And now you know why me and this person arent that close anymore.

Angel by Kate Voegele

I've said it once and I'll say it again
I've got something hanging over my head
I was laying on your shoulder, perfectly content
Until you told me all over again

I ain't got no sob story to write
but just like everyone else I'm living this life
And you don't need to win me over
And there ain't no other side
to shelter me from
I belong where I decide

But you say we don't mess around,
you've got no freedom to come down
We don't take angels from the sky
Oh no we don't mess around,
you're meant to be among the clouds
Cause you're an angel
But that's a lie

Well I suppose you think I'm so flattered to hear
that I'm the whisper conscience in your ear
And that's exactly the reason that I'll never fit in here
Well nothing's ever that black and white my dear

But you say we don't mess around,
you've got no freedom to come down
We don't take angels from the sky
Oh no we don't mess around,
you're meant to be among the clouds
Cause you're an angel
But that's a lie

I'm not your angel, darling
I'm not your angel, darling
(I'm never gonna be)
I'm not your angel, darling
I'm not your angel, darling
(I'm never gonna be)

We don't mess around,
you've got no freedom to come down
We don't take angels from the sky
Oh no we don't mess around,
you're meant to be among the clouds
Cause you're an angel
But that's a lie

Things Have Been Crazy

Ever since Tuesday things around my house have been crazy, sad, depressing. My dad is so devastated about what happened. He can't seem to shake this one. I know it's gonna take a while but I hate seeing him cry like this. He still can't believe it happened. We have him filed for unemployment and he has been looking for a new job like crazy. At least he isnt just sitting around doing nothing. He knows that he needs to get back out there. He is waiting to hear back on a few things and is ready to go look other places. He has plenty of people to give him recommendations which is amazing. Doctors and patients which is even better. He told me he isn't too proud to do anything. I know he will get through it. He just needs to keep his head up. He knows he has family that will be there for him no matter what and we are here to help. I had a nightmare last night that I came home one day and he had killed himself. I freaked out. Every time I come home I'm afraid to come through the door because I don't know what I will find. It's scary. I cannot wait for this phase to be over with.